I'm almost done with the total house clean (inside) down to the last room, a large one too, that has been used for mostly storage after closing two businesses in 09... (Wow was it that long ago!?)
After wading through, investigating, sorting through, filing, re-packaging or disposing of box after box and stack after stack of stored items and business papers related to a large business, my room has emerged and I can see I only have a few hours to go! Woot!
Only a few items I kept putting aside for later remain and for the most part that consists of things I am undecided about their fate, trash to go out and the dog beds, toys, clothes and blankets. I couldn't bring myself to go through or consider those for the week and a half this on and off project has taken. Now I have to.
There is a four foot tall stack of beds, mostly new, because neither of my dogs liked them and the cat won't go near them. They are big, cushy, beautiful stylish and expensive beds gone unappreciated for years. There is a couple of pads and a couple of scroungy looking beds that were the only things my first dog liked. These obviously need to be sold or given away. And I ponder over another bed that isn't in this pile. It is a Victorian style which again, was never used by any pet. I originally bought it to go in my Victorian style bedroom, but the dog insisted on sleeping with me in my bed instead.
Even though no pet has ever barely even sniffed the thing, it seems like it is a reminder of them all and a nice interesting piece of furniture. But I don't need it anymore. Do I give up that constant memory too? That's just one dilemma.
Another bag of dog goodies contains small blankets and a large stack of size 4 Toddler T-shirts I bought for my first Schipperkee, Tara. She loved her shirts and they calmed her down. When she got tired of wearing a shirt, she could get one off in about thirty seconds if she wanted to. So, I know when she had them on she was digging it. It became a habit that wherever I traveled she got a souvenir shirt, as well as a walk through any clothing store might end with me buying her something I imagined she would look adorable in.
If this seems odd, you have to remember, my children were grown and I have no grand children, so she was indeed my baby. Now, I touch these shirts and recall the occasions with so many good memories of how cool Tara was and how much I loved her going through my head. Now, what should I do with these? Donate them to a human charity or a pet shelter? They fit small animals perfectly but they are toddler clothes. A few are new or like new.
Lastly, there is a large garbage bag full of toys, mostly stuffed animals, a few squeaky things, a rope bone, and other typical dog toys, with about half of them being new and never played with. Obviously, my desire to show love to my dog by buying her things didn't match her picky-ness about what she was interested in. The stuffed animals, now I can see, anything cute and cuddly reminded me of Tara, so I bought it. And now, that's all I have left of her are these reminders.
I think I will pull out three new Christmas stuffed toys and another thing or two, but at the end I am left wondering about the regular stuffed toys, do those go to kids or to a shelter if one wants them? My dog rarely shredded anything so she could have kids toys but I don't know if that is true for most animals.
So my general two fold hang up that set me out on taking this break, is getting stuck in the memories, and the decision about what to do with these heart string items still lay before me to deal with one more time. I had to sit down and think about it and status update turned into a blog. I don't know if it is procrastination or stalling, or maybe I wish someone could tell me what to do so I wouldn't have to think about it anymore.
WOW TALK ABOUT YOUR PERFECT TIMING I wrote the last sentence and KGirl called me. She works at a pet facility and all of these items can go to a really good place that needs them. All of it. Problems solved. Now I can go back and get these things in their final stack to go.
It's a good tribute to Tara and all of my pets. I will keep a few things for now knowing when I'm ready to let go, there's a place waiting to appreciate it.
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